DRIBBLING CRISIS: Looking for a post box…

Ed Spencer’s The Last Thing Anyone Thing Anyone Needs Is A Dribbling Crisis (and Oher Small Talk) is a blackly comic collection of thoughts, stories and things that probably shouldn’t have happened.

SECTION 1: KNOCKIN ABOUT THE NEIGHBOURHOOD

STORY: P.O.

I don’t trust post boxes.

How can anyone?

Little red tubs, standing in the street.

How is that secure?

How does anything ever get anywhere?

What a set-up.

And then of course I needed to post a letter.

It had been a long time since I had had to post a letter.

Off I went, letter in sweaty hand.

I walked past three post boxes. The vibe just didn’t seem right with any of them.

One – underneath some scaffolding. Postie ain’t gonna get that is he? Not gonna go burrow about down there.

I chucked the letter in a nice clean bin.

I thought: It’s got as good a chance as any in there.

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